Who else is out there?

Hello Corporeal carbon units, I come in peace! However there are many other aliens who most definitely do not come in peace!To help this race out I have complained a list of aliens that may visit earth and how to deal with them.

1. E.T- Friendly, easy to befriend. E.T’s spices is peaceful and please, Humanity, when “ET go Home”, let him go home.


2. Cyborgs- Neutral, Cyborgs can be either friendly or hostile. The are artificial intelligence created by an extremely intelligent species, so it really depends on the mother spices whether or not they are violent .


3. Na’vi- Friendly, this is a primitive but peaceful race, who has a high consciousness of their world around them.


4. Master Yoda-definitely friendly, its is unknown what species Master Yoda is, but with his wisdom, power and grace, it is unquestionable that humanity needs Master Yoda to give them guidance.


5. The Grey-a mysterious species that has been said to be visiting earth since humanity was young, not much is know except that they have large flying saucers and are grey in colour, all other information is red-tapped by the government, or so the conspiracy theorists say.


6. Prawns- Not so friendly, not so much is known about the Prawns so it is unclear whether they are unfriendly or not, perhaps if they were educated and conttact was made with their leaders,they would be friendly.

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7.  Gorn- Unfriendly, they are extremely territorial and will be difficult to fight technologically, however, they are reptilians and are therefore slow moving and cant survive in extremely hot or cold environments. Humans should be able to defeat them in hand to hand combat.Captain Kirk has proven that it is possible


8. Ewoks- Friendly, these furry little creatures may seem cute and adorable, but don’t let appearances fool you,these little guys can take out a whole squadron of storm troopers!


9. Tribbles-Dangerous, these cute furry little creatures only have one purpose and one need, to reproduce. They don’t even need a tribble of the opposite gender to reproduce! Beware when dealing with these little creatures, because, before you know it, you’ll be drowning in a sea of tribbles!


10. Klingons-Hostile. Klingnons are a war like race, that thrive in battle and live under a strict code of honor and valor. They don’t generally cooperate with humans,as they find humans weak and pitiful, however the races can work together and establish peace treaties.


11. Vogons-Unpleasant, avoid at all costs. While they aren’t evil, they are bad tempered, bureaucratic, officious and callous.”They wouldn’t even lift a finger to save their own grandmothers from the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal without an order, signed in triplicate, sent in, sent back, queried, lost, found, subjected to public enquiry, lost again, and finally buried in soft peat for three months and recycled as firelighters.” The universe considers them the third worst poets in the entire history of the universe.



12. Yautja aka Predators- Run, super dangerous! Unless you’re Arnold Schwarzenegger, there is no way that you’ll surive an encounter with a Predator.

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13. Xenomorph- Again run! Do not even think of fighting these creatures. These are most likely the most deadly of all aliens. They start their lives as egg like creatures and then they impregnate themselves into a host, where they grow. Finally they rip out of the hosts body as a worm like creature and then grow into a Xenomorphs. They said to be created by the Mala’kak.


14. Mala’kak- unfriendly to lowly, primitive life forms, such as humans. The Mala’kak are also known as ‘The Engineers’ as it is said that they created humans and Xenomorphs. From what I last heard, the Mala’kak want to destroy humanity, so if you see one, RUN!


15. Vulcans-Friendly. These are a advanced humanoid race, who revolve and the philosophy of logic. They do everything logically. They don’t have emotions,as they see them illogical. Gene Roddenberry predicts that humanity will have First Contact on the 5 April 2063. He also predicts that Vulcans will be the first extra-terrestrials that humanity encounters.Vulcans are my favorite race and I hope to meet them one day. Dif tor heh smusma! (Live long and prosper in Vulcan)



District 9 existential crisis!

The other day I watched ‘District 9’. I last saw it a few years ago, and dismissed it as an fun sci-fi apartheid allegory. However when I watched it again, I was intrigued. Questions and theories ran wildly through my head.

1. Why did the aliens land on earth?

2. Why does the ‘fuel’ make Rikus morph into a Prawn?

3. Wouldn’t an alien species who is capable of space travel, be much, much smarter and organised than the prawns are?

4. Why is Christopher seemingly the only highly intelligent prawn?

‘District Nine’ leaves one hanging! One does not simply end a movie with so much unanswered questions!

While the sequel with all the answers is yet to be filmed, I have come up with my own theories. 

1. I think that the mother ship is transporting prisoners to a secure location, such as a prison on a remote asteroid ,moon or desolate planet. While the ship is in flight, the prisoners riot and take control of the ship, killing all the Wardens, scientists, engineers and Queen. While rioting, I think the ship is damaged and therefore it has to dock by the nearest life sustaining planet: Earth. 

2. I think the Prawns are high advanced in genetic engineering, therefore all there systems run on DNA. That is why humans cant use prawn technology, as Prawn DNA is the energy source for their technology. Therefore when Rikus comes in contact with the Fuel, he changes, as the Prawns and the humans would likely share Genes, but the Prawn genes are dominant to humans therefore the fluid alters Rikus’s DNA and appearance.

3 and 4. From what we can see, the Prawns are descendants of instincts. Most insects require a Queen to give them leadership, so when the prisoners rioted, they lost contact with their, Queen, leaving them helpless and without leadership. However I think in Prawn society there are the workers, and then the high end society members, who work as academics,as there is in insects colonies. The workers require the Queen to function and the high end members have evolved past the need. Again here is another allegory of the beliefs associated with the apartheid. Christopher, must have been a intellectual, part of this elite group, who was working on the ship and managed to escape with his son. 

So in conclusion, the prawns are convicts who are stranded on earth.



Women in metal

Today, while I was procrastinating, I noticed that the bassist, of one of my favorite bands, is a woman! I was overcome with happiness, a woman in a metal band! Now this band isn’t some girl band who sings ‘bubble gum’ rock songs. This band ‘The Dreaming’ is an all male, except for Nadja Peulen the bassist, hardcore metal band.

Many say that metal is unladylike and while the majority of Metal Heads are men, there are definitely some women who defy social protocol. These women have my utmost admiration, so in celebration of these women here are a list of some of my favorite Metal Goddesses

1. Nadja Peulen- bass player for ‘The Dreaming’ and ex bassist for ‘Coal Chamber’.



2. Angela Gossow- Lead singer for ‘Arch Enemy’ and by singer I mean death vocalist!

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3. Alissa White-Gluz -Lead singer for ‘The Antagonist’ also sings death vocals.


4. Joan Jett- Mother of rock and roll- Guitar and vocals for ‘The Runaways’ and she had a solo career.




5. Amy Lee- Leader singer for ‘Evanescence’.



6. Commander in chief- solo artist, plays guitar and sings.



7. The great Kat- Solo artist, plays guitar and sings.



8. Taylor Momsen- Lead singer of the ‘The Pretty Reckless’.



9. Maria Brink- Lead singer of ‘In this moment’.




10. Lzzy Hale- Lead singer and rhythm guitarist of Halestorm. Halestorm-Carnival-of-Madness-Tour-12